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The broken roof
Between my fears
Questioning my existence...
I ask myself
Is there acceptance..?
To be found
But not broken
To be outspoken
But your eyes would not stand for it
The glares and snares deemed it forbidden
Since then I shut myself out and away in the distance
Locked inside my mind / Afraid of all humankind
I fell under the pressure / Damaged by society's pleasure
I let go of all possessions / I threw away my humiliation
Dub me another lonely soul
For I am no longer meant this world
I ripped your burdens away from my shoulders
Skin of stone
In my home
Completely exhausted eyes
Looking back again
I wouldn't last
Of this reality
Even when I'm at my weakest
I still lend you my strength
Even when my eyes are their darkest
I still look out for you the best way I can
I'm not the hero of the day
I just know what's right
I'm not some selfless saint
Someone has to bear the light
I don't expect any praise
All my deeds are of the same kind
I need not your thanks
No relief can fill this void in my life
No rest for the wicked / No love for the abandoned
No hope for the innocent / No pain for the departed
I'll give you my all / I'll rise while I fall
I'll answer your call / I'll serve until there's no pulse
I'm not looking for acknowledgment
Remember not my face
I don't consider labels an accomplishment
Forget to speak of my name
I will leave none a victim of relinquishment
You will not witness that pain
I'm merely here to cure the inhumane infections
For we are all one in the same
Even when all seems hopeless
I will come to turn the tides
Even when I'm left powerless
I will always be
Hardships are a token
There's so many scars
I'm proud to be broken
I'm a living shard
I live off of regret
Breathing in certainty
My life feeds on suspense
It's almost considered a dependency
People break down sometimes
That's an understatement
Pretending to walk the line
While hope is in fragments
Can you imagine-
Enduring another lifetime
Even a fraction-
Of the pain I called mine?
I reach for the sky / Sweat falls in the fire
Worshiped halos remain shy / Shall I wait here forever?
People say we are all loved
That's nothing but a lie
Belief and trust become lost
That's the only truth I will testify
The gates will stay closed-
Backs will be turned
I will pray no more-
Only to try and justify the hurt
Some things are just not meant to be
No expectations- means no let downs
My own words are the only ones I'll believe
I was once lost, and I was once never found
And when death finally comes for me
My hollowed soul won't be raised
It will learn that statues nev
Heart: The Destruction
I'm left dreamless
Every single night...
I remain sleepless
With bloodshot eyes...
You race through my mind
Images that I can't stand
And time after time
You're depleting my strength
A plague of mixed emotions
My tears act like quicksand
I'm torn in every direction
By these encrypted feelings I don't understand
I wish my heart would stay hidden
And so far away from you
To confess would be forbidden
And everyday I would barely get through
I've fallen so low / Into the darkness below
By the sorrow of my soul / It's consuming me whole
There is no escape
From whats bottled up inside
My desire for you won't ever fade
And it's something that I'm failing to hide
I continue to yearn for you so much
Even if you're right here beside me
But I can't let our friendship be crossed
So this dilemma will never let me be free
In the window...
In the ocean...
I see sorrow
I see confusion
I'll wake up tomorrow
And...forget my confessions
I regret every given sin
Replaying it all in my mind
Tattoos repent on my skin
They're serving a lifetime
Scars reveal past pain
And it's all mine
I see my eyes! / I fear my lies!
I scream inside! / I hide behind!
Tears won't fade! / Lost my faith!
I'm not okay! / It's too late!
I see through the cracks
Into my fallen reality
I put up a poor act
My transparent sanity
My soul finally snapped
Unleashed the real me
In the mirror...
In the destruction...
I see terror
I see justification
I'll wake up as an avenger
...Of my former reflection
Temptation is immune to rejection
Yearning for the taste of a blurred salvation
Thirst is my disgraceful enemy
And sometimes it gets the best of me
Thoughts caught up in warfare
Arguing with the worst side of my personality
These dark circles around my eyes lead nowhere
The center of it is the source of my frailty
Isolation is the last resort
The final stand against another end
But only until reality distorts
And then there's nothing left to defend
Bottom of a bottle / Bevel of a needle
Betrayal of a lifestyle / Blessing of a smile
Immersing my mind in numbness
Temporarily freed from this destiny
The cruelty fades into darkness
I indulge in this sensation heavily
Forcing a long-awaited blackout
I feel that it's desperately needed
And when my tired eyelids come down
The power of my pride will finally be defeated
Dependency is fueled by weakness
Once broken- I become shapeless
I abandoned all insecurities
So here's a toast to the death o
It's my world
These are my shoulders
It's my burden
These are my problems
It's my life
These are the tears I cry
It's my truth
These are my last moments with you
When you said those words
My vision got blurry
We couldn't be "us" anymore
It divides me
Double-edged love / I needed you so much
You're all I really got / Without you- I'm lost
When you walked away
I met the ground
I felt a ripping pain
A deafening sound
I won't get up again
This is my place now
This is me on my knees
Let me be weak
This is me breaking down
Let me cry out
This is me at my worst
Let me be hurt
This is me crushing my heart
Please...let me fall apart...in your arms
It's a different kind of feeling
When last resorts are no longer a choice
And it keeps on spreading
Far past the breaking point
It's beyond right or wrong
For someone to endure these moments
It's a cruel sensation to become undone
And to be left alone to face this on-coming carnage
Piece by piece- I slip / Belief after belief- I drip
Tear by tear- I smile / Prayer after prayer- I exhale
It's neither an ending nor a beginning
When life and death trade names
It's just a cycle, spinning
The wheels of fate
I've been broken down
My time is over
The earth is my resting place now
My ashes shall remain here forever
Are seen as abominations among humanity
I'm a another stereotype labeled by society
Even though I'm trying my best to just be me
I may not walk the same
But I still have my own path
I have my own footsteps to make
And my own happiness to grasp
You see me how you want to
I am who I am
You have your own narrow point of view
But I am just another human
So many words to be said / So much hate to be meant
Lash out towards the difference / Guilt trip my already-clouded conscience
I am not the one who is typical
I choose to look a different way
You need to look in the mirror
And ask what does a dictator always say?
I don't want to be like anyone else
Divide the bland similarities in between
I need not your help to be myself
Separate the judgments from belief
Will finally see
That I'm not a freak
I'm just unique
Sonnet VIOh precious love sworn to passionate pain
Care not for losing Love's seasonal grace,
For it is fitful Love's to love again
And Love shall later love another face,
And of faithful love, Love loves to speak,
A love which lasts till Love's closing day,
Yet, Love loves to imprint every spare cheek
With more love than what one Love can pay,
Unsettled, the scales of love do shake,
Though Love's love for compromise is known,
Still Love from tenure will in time break,
For only love, not Love, is a man's own.
And on every morrow, Love tells a tale
Of merry things upon love's vagrant trail.
Satisfaction is a ShadowSatisfaction is a shadow
So near and yet so far,
Which yearns for yet another moon
And feeds on every star.
The rich remain forever poor
And the poor; truly rich,
And heaven falls to sordid waste
Curing Man's endless itch.
More copious than the cosmos
Yet once a pinch of snuff,
Has humanity forgotten
Enough was once enough?
Aura: The Radiance
Aura: The Radiance
I wore this pain like a crown / I was so broken
I kept on falling down / I felt my soul shattering
I couldn't hear anything / listening to my own twisted thoughts
I was blinded from everything / witnessing my own tragic downfall
I stopped dreaming of better days / I ceased believing long ago
My countless nightmares wouldn't fade / I was left in this dark world alone
I guess this is how I really pictured my own end
I just want it to finally be over with, I won't resent death
To the end of this long, and lonely road
Dangling on my unfinished rope
Lift me up, lift me up, lift me up, and don't let me go!
Hold me high, hold me high, hold me high, and give me hope!
Revive the light
Inside the dark
Given a second life
Resurrecting my heart
Cascade of colors
Fade away the gray
Open up a new world
Where shame has no place
Standing up to society's face's
Takes every ounce of courage
Never damaged or discriminated against
Because we're all going throug
Rain Of Thunder
Rain Of Thunder
I took the gift of light for granted-
Assuming I would always see
But when my world darkened-
My fears took the best of me
And I would give anything
Just to see a spark or a glow
But my faith was also fading
Withering away like my hope
The only sight I had
Was beyond the walls in my mind
But they were just figments from the past
A false savior that I could only hide behind
The shadows were becoming my mask
It was shielding me from living my life
The skies rumbled ominously / Like cries echoing sorrowfully
I felt rain falling endlessly / Like infinite liquid apologies
Reality shed the blackness / The roars fiercely pierced
My eyes ignited the darkness / The heavens suddenly burst
What once was lost
Can also be found
For effects without a cause
Nothing would ever be returned
Our paths will once again cross
For destiny is bound
The lowest of the low-
I have seen
Angel TearsImagine a raindrop is an angel's tear
Falling from heaven on Gaia's mortal fear
Weeping in unity their children's lost soul
Heaven's pure spirit evil now doth control
Eden of rapture consumed by time's flow
A lost utopia where gluttony doth grow.
Alluring serpent's lair humans covet the bait
Devourer of truth so poisoned with hate
Innocence now lost in maelstrom of desire
Purity long blackened by greed's hungry fire
The spirit debased evil darkens the heart
The nefarious abductor tears the soul apart
The moment approaches the farmer shall reap
Love now eternal for faithful lost sheep
Gnashing of teeth those left in despair
Time now elapsed for repentance and prayer
Renounce the darkness and take gentle heed
Embrace the truth be the Lamb's seed
An Ode to The PhantomThere is a boat on a lake,
Burning candles on a cold black mirror.
And this journey I will take,
To find the man that I’ve been looking for.
I’ll find him I swear,
Chase him into the blackest night,
I’ll find his lonely lair.
And dry the tears from behind his mask.
What will lurk behind?
Some haunted face or tender spirit.
I shall say words truly kind,
And try to put his broken soul together.
Across the keys his fingers dance,
Enchanting beauty and bewitching senses.
I am lost within a trance,
And I know I’ll be forever his.
Away from judgement and from light,
We will spend the years together.
And I’ll live in this blackest night,
And stay with him forever more.
So Sick...I am so sick of feeling alone.
Time heals wounds, but mine have only grown.
The people around me are happy.
But I am still feeling crappy.
Some time has passed and I thought it would change.
But it has only gotten worse. Isn't that strange?
I try to stay tough.
But I know that's just a bluff.
Isn't it sad that I have to lie?
Not to anyone else but to myself.
What is really sad is that I don't care.
I treat myself like garbage, is that fair?
Its fine, it really does not matter.
My words, they are just meaningless chatter.
Don't get me wrong, I am glad everyone's lives are better.
I just wish that I did not have to sit here and see my palms getting wetter.
Embers In The Rain
Embers In The Rain
My blood contains the power of the sun
Instigation becomes dangerous
And when control is reduced to none
My rage is monstrous
There's no turning back when it begins
I will be searching for a source to blame
I will unleash a torrent of hell from within
For I am known as the bearer of the flame
I loath crossing that line
Being locked behind blind eyes
But I won't regret the ruins that I will create
As I leave supernova footprints in my wake
I destroy everything more than once! / My limits are undone!
Infinite ashes haunt darkening lungs! / My heart becomes numb!
Consuming infernos help me cope
As I bathe in the smothering smoke
Cleansing the vengeance
New aged repentance
Searing the memories that I yearn
As soothing water puts out my roaring fire
My traumatized eyes sting and burn
I can never call myself a survivor
The aftermath is my salvation
For I am alone once again
This was my last trial and tribulation
Now I am just another ember in the rain<
i miss you...I sit here in this rain,
Thinking of you.
But no matter how long I wait on this bench,
You will never meet me here.
I’ve got on my best dress, my cane,
Even that old bowler hat you always liked,
And I wait at the bench where we first met.
But you will never meet me here again.
I lean on my cane in front of me,
Thinking of you,
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Lilyas has dedicated herself to making our community a brighter place with her vibrant artwork and infectious enthusiasm for interacting with others in our community. It has certainly paid off, as many deviants flock to her page on a daily basis to let her know how much of an inspiration she is. We absolutely agree, and couldn't let all that hard work go without recognition, so it's with great pride that we bestow the Deviousness Award for March 2014, to ... Read More